{ This guest post was written by fellow mom and blogger, The Honest Mom }
Motherhood is tough, but what happens to a Mother’s body is even tougher. We go through 10 months (they tell you it’s 9, but it’s all lies! 40 weeks=10 months!) of drastic and intense body changes, internally and externally. While you get this beautiful and miraculous little bundle of joy, you also end up looking like a busted tube of crescent roll dough…. We don’t all bounce back like Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian… (Although I really wish I did!)
During my pregnancy I gained right around 80 pounds… 80 pounds… That’s like a freaking 9-year-old. I just couldn’t control my weight gain, and after a while, I figured, screw it, if I’m going to gain weight I might as well go big or go home. Taco Bell, Little Caesars, and freezer section taquitos became my friends.
At my last appointment before I had my little girl, I weighed in at 248 pounds. I could not believe that I had put on so much weight.
Once I gave birth, I started my long journey to getting my body back! 10 months later I have finally lost the 80 pounds of pregnancy weight, but I am still going strong! These are some of the lessons I’ve learned along the way.
Say Goodbye to Your Old Self
Drastic body fluctuations and parenthood changes a person. It is inevitable. Don’t hold on to the person you used to be. Embrace the new you; the better you; the ‘Mom’ you.
Look in the Mirror and Point Out What You Love About Yourself
The first thing I did when we got home from the hospital was look at myself in the mirror. I looked and felt so different. It was scary. Although some parts of my body terrified me (I’ll leave that to the imagination), I pointed out the parts of myself that I still loved, and it made the differences seem not so bad. My skin was the best it’s ever been ever since I had my daughter. I had THE WORST acne for as far back as I could remember, but since giving birth, I have had near perfect skin (knock on wood!). My butt was also AMAZING. Yes, I gained a crap ton of weight, but my booty was still on point, and that meant something to me. When faced with negative thoughts, you’ve got to remember the positives.
If You Don’t Like Something, Change It
Don’t ever feel ashamed for changing something that you don’t like. I felt fat and gross, so I started working out and meal prepping. Instead of wallowing in my own self-pity, I kicked my ass in gear and changed what I didn’t like. At the end of the day, it’s your body and your life. If you are happy that is all that matters. I have stretch marks ALL over my body. I hate them…. I hate them, I hate them, I hate them. I totally get the women that love theirs and are proud of them. I totally understand it, and I support any Mother that feels proud of theirs. I just personally don’t like mine and the way they make me feel, so I have started using lotions to fade the look of them. The bottom line is that you have the power to create the body and life that you want for yourself.
Understand the Gravity of What You’ve Done
You just gave another human being life…. A living, breathing person with thoughts and feelings… You made them… (well, with a little help from dear old Dad) THAT IS AMAZING. The stork didn’t just drop this kid off on your porch! Realize the miracle you’ve just gone through and cut yourself some slack! Be gentle with yourself. If you’re making progress towards your goals (internal and external) that is all that matters. You’re not going to just drop your baby weight and heal your lady bits or C-section incision over night!
Build Other Mommas Up
This is the lesson that gets me. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND why Moms judge and tear each other down. I cannot fathom why any Mom would do this to another. As a Mom I lose my shit daily. I constantly feel like my body is a wreck, and I’m not doing a good enough job being a Mom. Why would another woman feel like it is necessary to judge me more than I am already judging myself? This is madness. COMPLETE MADNESS. Build other Mommas up! Compliment them. Tell them they are beautiful. Let them vent to you. Let them confide in you. Be the one to tell them it’s going to be okay, and that she is doing the best she can. If we spent our energy building each other up as opposed to tearing each other down, can you imagine what better Mothers and human beings we would all be?
Final Thoughts
I have changed so much as a person since becoming a Mom. I have a whole new perspective. Life is about finding happiness and living the best life you can. It doesn’t matter what you look like or how you parent. If you and your family are happy and healthy that is all that matters. Embracing your mom bod isn’t just about a number on the scale, or how dark your stretch marks are, or what a disaster your lady bits are. Embracing your mom bod is about loving this new person you’re evolving into, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Live your best life, laugh at your mistakes, love with your whole heart, embrace your ‘Mom bod’.
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Thank you for speaking so truthfully about a topic that us moms tend to shy away from. It took me years to rebuild my confidence in my body after having 3 kids and it took me a few more years to embrace the “if you don’t like something, then change it” mentality. 🙂
I loved this post and the many great points made here. From my perspective it is so important to be happy and content with yourself first, in terms of your life, your loved ones… and your priorities should come from that. Focus on what really matters rather than spending time obsessing over something that you can’t change overnight – adopting a positive outlook is always a far better way to go.
Yes to all of this. It can be hard to love your new self after a baby. Society tells us all the time that you should look and act like before a baby. But embracing the changes is a great thing, and we can find peace with ourselves when we do. <3
I love this post. Being a mom changes us in so many ways, and the body is always the toughest to deal with!
So much truth here! One of my first ever blog posts was “Why I’m not trying to “get back” into shape.” My point was, that sure I want to be healthy and feel good in my post pregnancy bod, but there is NO GOING BACK. The best thing to do is aim for health, be supportive of others, and keep moving forward in life!
I’m a new mom and it’s true that once you become a mom or a parent everything will change. And for us, IT WAS A GOOD CHANGE:) Lovely guests post:)
I just had my first child less than 5 months ago. This is something I have dealt with on a daily basis since he was born. I felt disgusted with myself everytime I walked by a mirror. Now, I’ve realized there are more important things than just getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Teaching my son the ways of life! Yes, I still plan on reaching my goal, but it’s not number 1 on my list! Thanks for sharing your personal journey!
An interesting guest post. I am happy with my mum body, not what I used to be but I love me.
it’s never easy readjusting to the new bod, thats for sure!
This is such a great motivating post . Everyone’s journey is different and we all handle the ‘after birth body’ differently. I feel like I’m more accepting these days, but I’m sure as I’ve aged that has helped !
This is just what I needed to read at 2 months postpartum. I felt good about myself until it dawned on me that I still have a ways to go until I feel like myself. Thanks for the encouragement to get moving and working.
I’ve learnt to accept my new shape but I think that had to do with me getting older and understanding more and accepting me as a person 🙂