It’s funny what time can do for a person. Because time, my friends, has slowed down to the pace of a woman struggling because of a less than adequate amount of upper body strength to three-step it through the rush hour crush which allows her to cover in twenty whole minutes a distance one covered in a mere seven (yes, I might have timed it).

I have had a lot of time, in the last two and a half weeks, to reflect on many things. And I have come to the potentially morbid conclusion (brought on by a singular increase of annoyance stemming from being so SLOW) that were I to croak, there are two things I would want to ask those stuck here on earth to take on in my honor:

1 – to stop calling Kit Kats, Mars bars and other such sugary treats chocolate.

2 – to take their headphones off. ‘iPod nation’ is a place filled with people who, while they are nice, are unaware, lost in their own world, already egocentric and even more so when blanketed within their sound bubble. Hence they don’t share their niceness. In the void provided by this lack of niceness, greed has been allowed to grow and that’s why people don’t hold the door open for, say, a woman struggling because of yadda yadda (refer to the first paragraph of this post).

So take off your headphones of heedlessness, o people of iPod nation, and remember what it’s like to hear the birds chirping and a clumsy woman falling!